Categories: Editorials

Bowser’s Takeover of Nintendo a Possible Move Against Disney

Sarcasm and satire warning.

The mouse better watch out. Its alliance with Square-Enix has taken it to a path where they’re able to use the Disney Princesses’s and the power of the keyblade to push the Marvel Universe forward and have Thanos become a household name. Until now there hasn’t been a great challenger to Disney and it’s empire based around damsels in distress and large purple monsters trying to destroy half the universe. Now Bowser is in control.

One thing we know Bowser can do and that’s capture a princess. Kicking Reggie to the curb, Nintendo of America has allied with the one true super power that will take the kingdom of toads to the next dark epoch in the ever expanding war for you to consume media.

What’s that in the background….
Day 1 – Largest problem contained.

While darkness falls over the Mushroom Kingdom and Bowser takes over the reigns, installing lava jets throughout the campus and turning people into turtles, Disney will need to watch out before the next Kingdom Hearts features Sora, Mario and Luigi rolling through the world of Zelda, Splatoon, Xenosaga, Fire Emblem, etc. as the new head of Nintendo USA is absolutely ready to do whatever it takes to squash the plumber and the competition.

While the heartless may have built a machine to use the Disney princesse’s for their own nefarious needs, Bowser will literally build airships. Airships are cool and in the sky and unless you have a magical hat you’re not getting anywhere near it.

Bowser isn’t just American, he also has roots elsewhere:

Chicharito!!! Gooooooooal Mexico 🇲🇽!!— Doug Bowser (@thetruebowser) June 23, 2018

This is Nintendo “North America” after all and Mexico is a great location to eye the magical kingdom from.

If I was Disney, I’d be ressurecting as many marvel heroes and villians as I can and locking Square-Enix into an exclusive partnership in the game crossover as a game ordeal, before Bowser captures the princess, Shounen-jump and our hearts.

David Piner

David Piner, an accomplished video game journalist since 2001, excels in developing comprehensive guides and engaging content to enrich the gaming experience. As the esteemed former Managing Editor at TTH (as David "Xerin" Piner) for over a decade, David established a strong reputation for his perceptive analysis, captivating content, and streamlined guides. Having led skilled teams of writers and editors, David has been instrumental in producing an extensive collection of articles, reviews, and guides tailored to both casual and hardcore gamers aiming to enhance their skills. Dedicated to player-centric content, David meticulously crafts guides and articles with the players' interests in mind. He is a proud member of OUT Georgia and fervently champions equity and equality across all spheres.

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